Ch.10. Broken Hearted Girl

Rosalie's POV

That summer was the best ever. I got to teach the guys how to surf and even let them convince me to skate with them.
Also, my friendship with Emmett was better than ever and he…he knew how to cheer me up with his lovely dimpled smile. He definitely was my best friend. He had even tried to unsuccessfully make me quit smoking.
"I will only stop smoking for a really great reason, you know that." I told him.
"Okay then. I promise I will give you that so called reason, believe me Rose" He answered me back with a fierce look in his eyes.
Nick Sebraras and I started going out together and he even introduced me to his friends. It seemed they didn't care about me being part of their rivals and they actually were really nice.
So I had to split my time in order to hang out with the two groups. Nick and Emmett couldn't stand each other so I decided to keep my mouth shut and don't tell neither to Emmett about Port Angeles nor Nick about the other Captain being my closest friend.
There was just one thing that kept on bugging me all the time. Every night before falling asleep I kept on thinking about the same thing: Emmett.
I was not particularly good at reading boys signs but I had noticed there was something between Emmett and I that just didn't make sense to me…it seemed like he felt something else for me rather than just friendship which kinda made me nervous. I was used to having boys with clear intentions about me, like texting me saying they loved me and stuff like that but Emmett didn't. It was just the way he behaved around me.
Like when we were at the beach most of the times he wouldn't play rugby. The first time I thought he was just being nice but then I started noticing the way he behaved when the other guys were around me.
And…Okay I have to admit that it actually took me a whole summer to understand that the feeling was kind of…mutual? I kept on thinking about him all the time and…OMG…he sure was a hunk. 'How did it escape me all of this time?'
"Hey, Rose! Are you there?"
Nick's voice sort of woke me up. "Yeah, totally."
"Look what Mason brought." He put a sack of weed right in front of my eyes.
"Dude, you know I had some trouble quitting that sh**…"
"Don't worry sis…it's good to make a break from tobacco…" I looked at Rita who had already started rolling a cigarette.
When I was with the guys from Port Angeles I felt like they were my sort of evil side. I'd even started talking like them which involved cursing a lot. Not that I actually minded. They were worries-free and lived life to its limit which was really appealing to me.
"Gi'me that." I answered.
"Hey you motherf***ing bastard. Look where you put your feet!" Jaela complained when Damien tripped over her.
I really enjoyed smocking that one. I remember the thrill, the adrenaline running through my veins and then…I relaxed. Felt like I could spend all my life there. "Dude…this is awesome…We have to this more often…"
"Where are you going Rose?"
"I promised my friends I would join them at the beach…and it's like almost midnight. They probably will get suspicious if I don't show up."
"Okay then. I'll call you tomorrow."
"Yeah bitch. Don't let them catch you!"
"Don't worry Santana…You're my biz now!"
I can't remember how I actually found my car but I also wasn't particularly interested in thinking about it.
I sat down and inhaled the cold night air. 'Gee…this felt like awesome but I can't do this anymore…Emmett will figure everything out sooner or later and...Not a good idea.' I couldn't even remember my way back but somehow I found myself in front of the old house near the beach.   
They were all around the bonfire except Emmett. "Hey guys!"
"Hi Rose! Where have you been?" Seth asked.
"Doing some sh…mean…stuff…I guess." I felt my brother's eyes stabbing my back.
"You don't look so well…"Alice commented. "Are you ok?"
"Believe me, I feel like…best ever." I couldn't control my body so I started questioning myself if I really had just smoked one joint.
I heard Jasper moving and then again I found myself walking away from the bonfire with my twin brother by my side grabbing my arm.  
"Are you nuts Rose? I know you've been smoking weed…you smell like you've dived in a pool of pot!"
"I think I've just smoked one…" I giggled.
"I'm starting to think you hanging out with Nick isn't such a good idea."
"F*** you Jazz. You can't tell me what to do…" I shoved my brother away from me.
"Okay then. I'll leave you here. Just make sure you don't do anything reckless." His cold tone had no effect on me.
I decided to take my high heels off and kept on walking. 'Where the heck is Emmett?'
Soon I got the answer. I saw two figures moving against a rock. Even thought I wasn't in my best I automatically bent down on the sand.
My brain managed to establish a connection between the tallest figure and Emmett and I soon recognized Jessica's voice.
I saw them making out and it broke my heart. 'I was such a fool…Emmett never looked at me the way I wanted. I don't get it…like I know I'm the most beautiful girl in the town and most likely the hottest…how come didn't he notice me?' That moment I felt frustrated and annoyed…I had never felt that way…my heart had never been broken. Not even with Josh. 'I can't blame Emmett…I just saw things that never were.'

_____________

Emmett's POV

"Okay guys! Summer is over! And from now on you have to FOCCUS! And work out. Rickman, you're too lazy. You need to run faster. Emmett that tan is too GAY!" Our couch shouted. He used to insult everyone just to make us work even harder. "We have a good team but remember that the season ends in December and if we win the next two games we will be competing against Port Angeles High School for the title! This is the last year before going to college to many of you so make sure you end up in style! You can go! Get out of my sight. NOW!"
After picking up my stuff from the locker's room I waited for Rosalie to finish her Cheerios practice.
"Hi!"
"You scared the crap outta me dude. What you want?"
Dude? Rosalie had never called me dude. I had been noticing she was talking different since the end of summer. And acting pretty strange since she was always busy and she was never at home during weekends.
"Wanna go to the movies? I heard there was a really good movie on so I figured you would like to come…"
"Sorry but I'm sortta busy…I've things to do…" she rolled her eyes. She looked nervous and impatient, I guess.
"Hum…you've been acting kinda strange, you know?"
"What do you mean?" she was looking over my shoulder scanning the horizon while running her fingers through her perfect fair hair.  
"You talk different…you seem to be far away. Distant. When people are talking to you, you just seem to ignore them. Like you're doing now. Is everything okay?"
"Look I'm really busy. I've sh** to do." She excused herself while lighting a cigarette.

_____________

"Time just flies away bro…"
"Tell me about it. I can't believe it is December already!"
I walked away from the school entry towards Tyler's van where everyone was hanging.  Eric was talking excitedly with Alice and sometimes they would jump around which made me think they were already planning the graduation party (which would only happen in six months.)
"Emmett. You wanna come over my place?" Rose asked, when she passed by us. I offered to carry her books. "Thanks."
We covered the distance that separated us from my car in silence. I wondered what Rosalie wanted…She entered and quickly sat down.
"You look tired…" I observed.
"I'm confused Emmett. I'm tired of this place." She exhaled pretty loudly and I noticed her hands were shaking.
"I don't…what happened Rose?" her speech was worrying me like hell.
"I don't know…" she burst into tears. It hurt me seeing her like that so I pulled her into my chest. "I've…done it again Emmett…I knew I shouldn't have started...now. I want more. It's happening all over again. I just can't stop. I don't think I'm capable of saying no."
"What are you talking about?" My heart ached for her.
Her phone rang and she took the call. "Just a minute." She whispered to me. "Hi! OMG. No. But right now? Where? Great. Make sure they don't spot you. Santana needs a ride? I'll pick her up, no worries. What about Rita and Mason? Hum…okay then. You're here? I'm so there."
'Who the hell are those guys? Rita, Mason…Santana?!'
Faster than I could have ever imagined, Rose opened the door of my car and started running through the parking lot.
The adrenaline rushed through my veins and I ran after her. "Rose!" Everyone was watching us. "Wait!"
"No, Emmett! Don't!"
"What's happening to you?" I grabbed her arm and forced her to stop. "Look, we need to talk. There's something going terribly wrong with you."
I forced her to face me and when our eyes met I saw pain and sorrow all over them. She was aching. "Why do you keep on doing this to me Emmett?" she asked in a low voice so that no one could hear us. "You…drive me crazy! You're so special to me Em…don't play games with me."I was perplexed. What was she talking about? "Look I've to go."
A guy in a motorcycle stopped by and Rosalie hopped on which made me feel kinda awkward. Since when did she knew guys with motorcycles?

Rosalie's POV

I was out of control. I could feel it. That had gone too far. 'You don't want to ruin your life...all over again.'
We were alone in the parking lot since everyone was now gone. The wind was blowing hard and grey clouds started to appear, threatening our day.  
"Nick? I'm not feeling so well."
"I'll take you home then."
"It's better not. I don't want people asking me about the mysterious rider."
We got closer and he kissed my lips.  I closed my eyes and kissed him back. "You know that the big game is coming…"
"...Yes…"
"And I could use an…incentive." Nick suggested between kisses, while putting his hands around me. I didn't know how to stop him.
"…What about…a…reward…after the game?" I suggested, trying to breathe while Nick's hungry mouth covered mine.
He stopped and gave me that mischievous smile. "Okay then."
_____________

Those were really awful days…I had never felt so bad in my life. I guess I had never realized how painful love could be. Because I had never really loved someone. All my life I had used guys as a mean to an end: me. I felt like I needed them just because.
"Jazz…help me…You were right…I regret it so much…"
He looked deeply into my eyes and immediately I felt my mood getting better. His peaceful presence had such a huge influence on me.
"How do you do that…?"
"The same way you amaze people when you enter a room…" he took me into my bedroom. "The best thing to do now is rest. You know you have got through this once and you won. I want you to look at me and promise me you won't do anything reckless."
"Can I at least keep my normal cigarettes?"
"Yes, but I'm afraid I will have to take you cell phone with me."
All of that made part of the process. My brother had such a great power over people…I think Jasper could make a blind person truly believe that he or she could see.
"Does she need a doctor?" I heard Consuela's worried voice asking Jasper.
"No. You don't have to worry. She will be fine."  
I turned the lights off and just lay still on my bed. Yet I felt my thoughts swirling around my mind, invading unknown areas.
I started thinking about the day I arrived Forks. I thought I was the best and that I didn't need those dorks to live. Yet they had become my friends, my neighbours…they were part of my life…I would never forget them.
I also found myself more responsible and conscientious. I had learnt to care about people and also that the world doesn't necessarily turn around me…I had grown up.
Yet I had let myself deceive for the shortest and easy way out. Instead of facing Emmett about my feelings for him I had hid like a coward behind my addictions.
And this time I wouldn't use my mother as my scapegoat. Having bad parents shouldn't be an excuse for our mistakes. I didn't want to end up like my mother: I didn't want to be a cougar that doesn't think of her family and only cares about glam, fame and money.
Thus, I would confront Emmett after the big game.